


There's Nothin' Holding Me Back

by glitterminghao



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Love at First Sight, M/M, i still dont know how this tag thing works, j-unit!!!!, junhui is obsessed with hao, kpop idol!junhui, mysterious minghao, shawn mendes is still my writing muse, slight homphobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-05 00:39:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16800241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterminghao/pseuds/glitterminghao
Summary: in which junhui put his whole career on the line for minghao





	There's Nothin' Holding Me Back

> _I wanna follow where he goes_  
>  _I think about him and he knows it_

Junhui never knew it was possible to dream of the same thing over and over again in the course of seven consecutive nights. But it happened, and Junhui was left to lay on his bed as he stared up at his ceiling. His mind was occupied by only one person, the same person he kept dreaming about that night.

> Minghao.

His blonde curls that resemble Junhui's favorite ramen, his dainty fingers holding onto his mug of milk, the long expanse of his neck, and the way his brown trench coat ate his figure up on the day they met kept appearing in Junhui's dreams. It's always the same scene on repeat, as if his mind was playing a VHS tape of the moment when Junhui finally had the guts to approach the pretty boy and ask him for his name.

 _Fuck_ , Junhui thinks. He really wants to see Minghao again, and maybe--if he's brave enough to try--he might get to run his fingers through the boy's hair to test if it's really as soft as he imagines it to be.

He shuffles to check the alarm clock beside his bed, moving quietly to avoid waking up his group member who was sleeping on the bed next to his. Joshua was a really light sleeper and the boy gets cranky whenever he's woken up in the middle of the nightㅡJunhui knows, he had to face Joshua's wrath two days ago.

> 11:30 pm | Sat.

Would Minghao be at the cafe again at this hour?

For the past week after he met Minghao, the boy never failed to haunt Junhui's dreams every single night. It's always the same scene on loop, stringing Junhui along for the ride. And each night Junhui silently sneaks out of his dorm to go back to where they first met, in hopes of meeting Minghao again.

Every night he leaves on the same time but stays for a different duration, trying to map out Minghao's schedule and figure out what time of the day he usually goes to the cafe. Junhui approached him at exactly midnight that day, and ever since then Junhui had come back to the small cafe during the ungodliest hour of the day.

The bell hung above the door dings as he enters, catching the attention of the cashier at the counter. He probably recognizes his face already since he's the only customer who ever comes at such a late hour, and he's also probably annoyed at how Junhui just sits there every night for hours without ordering a single thing on the menu.

But Junhui feels that today would be different. It's Saturday, the same day and time he met Minghao, only 10 minutes earlier.

The feeling in his guts was proven correct when a boy with blonde ramen hair comes through the door, wearing the same oversized trench coat he had on a week ago. He immediately notices Junhui sitting alone near the window, and his gaze held something Junhui can't describe. Minghao looks and smiles at him as if he _knows_ Junhui couldn't sleep and eat because of him. Like he _knows_ Junhui's been going crazy looking for him everywhere.

And when Minghao confidently walks over, the sound of his heels clacking against the floor tiles, Junhui buckles his seat belt and readies himself for the ride.

> _I wanna let him take control_  
>  _'Cause everytime that he gets close, yeah_  
>  _He pulls me in enough to keep me guessing_

"Take me on another date and maybe I'll tell you." Minghao answers with a small smile, his eyes purposely avoiding Junhui's. He lets go of Junhui's hand and crouches down to pluck a bunch of small flowers, carefully bringing it up to his nose to take a sniff.

Minghao looks absolutely breathtaking like this, surrounded by nature along with the sun shining down on him.

But Junhui was too frustrated to appreciate the beautiful scene. He'd been trying to get to know Minghao for the past few hours of their date but all the boy ever did was dodge his questions or throw them back at him. Junhui felt exposed, having already told Minghao everything to know about himself. He felt rejected, as if their conversation was one sided. He felt as if he was standing infront of Minghao completely naked, while the latter still had all of his clothes on.

"I know what you're thinking, Junhui."

And there it is again. The voice that reels Junhui back into Minghao's cruel clutches accompanied by his mysterious gaze. Junhui still can't figure out what his gaze really holds. It could be longing, it could be fear, it could be love, Junhui might never know. He hates Minghao. He hates him so much, specially the way he withholds information about himself so Junhui would keep coming back for more, as if he wasn't already planning on following Minghao to the ends of the earth.

"I'm not uninterested in you. I just want to know you more first, so I turn your questions around and make you answer them." Minghao unbuttons the chest pocket on Junhui's shirt and gently places the flowers he plucked earlier inside it. "Please be patient with me. I'll tell you everything when the time comes."

Junhui's obviously lying. How could he hate someone so beautiful?

Then Minghao holds his hand with a small smile, his innocent doe eyes staring up at his companion as if asking for permission. Junhui smiles back, his frustration already melted away, and the boy takes it as his cue to start walking. Junhui takes in the sight of the boy walking in front of him. His blonde curls bouncing on top of his head, his dainty hand holding onto Junhui's calloused one, the way his head faces the sun like a beautiful yellow sunflower craving to be shined upon

This makes Junhui think, and he realizes that; _yeah_ , he'd let this boy drag him anywhere in the world and he'd follow without question.

> _And maybe I should stop and start confessing_  
>  _Confessing, yeah_

Junhui just came out from a meeting with his company, and it would be an understatement to say that he's _pissed_. He's way beyond that adjective, no words can describe how incredibly upset he's feeling right now.

They were originally supposed to talk about J-Unit's upcoming concert, but Junhui took this as his chance to ask for approvalㅡno, he didn't need their approval. He was going to be with Minghao whether his company approved of their relationship or not.

But the thing is, _the thing is_ , his manager was extremely against his relationship, _against Minghao_. He called Minghao insulting names in front of the company CEO when Junhui showed them pictures of the boy he loves and told them the whole sappy story of how they met and how Junhui's knees go weak at the mere thought of him.

 _"Junhui, I can't let your relationship with that..._ boy _come out in public. He looks like some random slutty prostitute you picked up from the streets. I suggest you end whatever connection you have with your little whore before he becomes the cause of your downfall."_

His manager was the only person Junhui trusted in this whole company (besides his members Joshua and Jeonghan, of course) and he threw him under the bus _just like tha_ t. Nobody can blame the Chinese boy for lividly walking out of the assembly room without another word. He just kept walking, his fingernails digging into the soft skin of his palms. He hated his manager for not seeing how beautiful Minghao is. He hated his members for not speaking up for him. He hated his CEO and the way he looked at Junhui as if he agreed with his manager's words. Junhui kept walking, his head faced down, letting his legs take him wherever they wish to go.

Junhui didn't even realize he was crying until he ran the back of his hand against his face and saw the smudged remains of his eyeliner on his skin. Looking around, it registered in his head that his legs took him to the place where he first saw Minghao. Junhui smiled a little at the thought of the boy, and he felt as if everything around him suddenly became colorful when he had thought of him.

He walked into the small coffee shop, cherishing the sound of the bell ringing when he opened the door, and sat on the table where he first approached Minghao. Everything in this place reminded him of the boy with curly hair. Minghao, Minghao, Minghao. The scent, the colors, the aura. They all screamed Minghao.

Fuck his company. Fuck his fans, his members. He wanted Minghao. He _needed_ Minghao.

So Junhui takes his phone out and started writing all the adoring words that come out of his heart whenever he thinks of his beautiful Minghao, turning them into a mellifluous melody that speaks of Junhui's feelings for the boy running through his mind all the damn time. He has to let Minghao know. Let him know how much Junhui loves him, how willing Junhui is to sacrifice everythingㅡhis reputation, his career, his heartㅡjust so he could be with Minghao.

> _Oh, I've been shaking_  
>  _I love it when you go crazy_  
>  _You take all my inhibitions_  
>  _Baby, there's nothing holding me back_

"Minghao, wait up!" Junhui yelled, struggling to put his coat on as he got dragged out of the cinema by his lover. He was answered by a giggle he knew all too well. Junhui can't even get mad at how Minghao literally drags him everywhere, walking infront of him and clutching onto his hand like an excited child tugging his mother wherever he wants to go.

"Come on, slowpoke! We're gonna miss the firework show." Minghao dropped his hand, making Junhui feel a bit disappointed at the loss of contact. He kept giggling as he twirled at the middle of the empty street, the soles of his sneakers dangerously grinding against the wet asphalt. When his coat was finally on properly, Junhui jogged a little to catch up and took his phone out to film the childish scene in front of him.

Junhui smiled fondly as he watched his lover through the eyes of his camera. He looked simply ethereal being silly like that. His blonde curls were flying all over the place, his smile reaching up to his ears, and his eyes reflecting the starry sky above them.

When the first drop of rain hit Junhui's phone screen, he immediately ended the video and kept his phone. "Hao! Come on now! It's raining." The said boy didn't comply and continued dancing and twirling in the rain. He gave Junhui subtle teasing glances, as if asking him to join him.

So Junhui complied and joined. He linked his fingers with Minghao and twirled along with him, the two of them dancing like crazy under the rain. Minghao started screaming in glee, yelling incoherent words as he laughed in Junhui's arms. Junhui followed suit, howling like a wolf to entertain his lover.

He finally scooped Minghao up into his arms when it started raining too hard, hugging the smaller boy's stomach to his face. Junhui started twirling, making Minghao scream louder with his arms in the air, and he did something neither of them has done before. He leaned down to kiss Junhui on the lips, catching the older boy off guard. His hands were desperately cupping his lover's rain soaked cheeks, and Junhui kissed back just as frantically.

Junhui couldn't help but think of how Minghao unknowingly helped him cross off the top item in his bucketlist: kiss a lover in the rain like in his favorite scene in The Notebook.

He was such a dork, but so was Minghao.

> _You take me places that tear up my reputation_  
>  _Manipulate my decisions_

"Hao, where are you taking me?" Junhui whispers as he cautiously follows his lover, who keeps passing through numerous dark alleyways. He was answered with silence, making him more and more nervous each step he takes.

Junhui invited Minghao to another date that morning, and the younger boy volunteered to do the planning. It made Junhui quite anxious partly because he isn't really fond of surprises but mostly because Minghao warned him that their date might not be as fun and romantic as he might have expected.

His anxiety hit its peak when his lover finally halted in front of a metal door. It seemed like a secret back door to some shady building where thugs reside and a bouncer would ask for a password before he'd let anyone in. But Junhui trusted Minghao's decision, knowing the latter would never purposely lead him to danger.

"Are you ready to enter my life?" Minghao asks, and Junhui almost laughs because he had already decided to be by Minghao's side forever when he first saw him in the cafe and there's no changing his mind. But he was stopped by the worry in Minghao's eyes, and all he could do to assure the boy that _yes, he's as ready as he'll ever be_ , is to hold both his hands and plant a small kiss on his forehead. His actions visibly made Minghao a little less tense

So Minghao takes a deep breath and opens the door.

Junhui was immediately greeted by loud music and flashing lights. _A club?_

"What are we doing here?"

Minghao glances at him a little bit, his eyes holding more worry than before. What is Minghao so worried of?

"Hey--" Before Junhui could even reach out and tug on the sleeve of Minghao's trench coat to comfort him, someone else stole Minghao's attention--someone with wavy raven hair wearing tight black boxers and a see-through shirt that barely covers his ribs. He also had on a pair of black high heels that lace up to his thighs that look _very_ similar to the shoes Junhui saw Minghao wearing the second time he caught sight of him at the cafe.

"Welcome back, Xu! Is this him?" The boy chirps, giving Minghao a hug and subtly gesturing to Junhui.

_What's going on?_

"Yeah. I just wanted to introduce him to everyone. Is that okay, Wonwoo?"

"Of course! But do that after your performance. You're the star today, sweetie. Mingyu's performance will be over in a little bit." The boy--Wonwoo--scrunched his face for a second before smiling sweetly and walking away, his heels clacking against the floor as he strutted.

Junhui's thoughts were disturbed when he felt a familiar hand entwine with his own. He looked down and saw his partner peering up at him like an innocent puppy. "Are you sure you want in on this, Junhui? This might change the way you look at me forever." There was a nervous glint in his eyes that made Junhui want to hug him. Is this what Minghao was so scared of?

"I don't think there's a single force in this world that could change how beautiful you are in my eyes." Junhui answers, giving the boy a small smile and his forehead another kiss. The gesture didn't seem to calm Minghao down, and it made Junhui worry. The former merely dragged him to the bar island at the back of the club where a bartender was busy polishing wine glasses.

Junhui was urged to sit down on one of the tall stools that surrounded the island while Minghao ordered them a drink. _He didn't even know Minghao drinks alcohol_.

"Would you mind explaining?" Junhui says as he downs the whiskey that was placed in front of him.

Minghao shook his head no, and downs his own drink in one swig. "I'd rather have you see for yourself." He then checks his watch and stands up, merely kissing Junhui's forehead before running away to a door labeled 'BACKSTAGE'.

A lot of things were running through Junhui's mind. He had a lot of questions for his lover, but he knew he had to trust Minghao. Besides, all of his questions were answered when Minghao got up on the stage wearing nothing but a collar, tight boxers and high heels, and climbed the metal pole like he was born to do it. Junhui couldn't even get mad or jealous when Minghao slowly took off his boxers, causing the old, balding men in the crowd to throw money at him. He was just breathless the whole time.

If this was what Minghao was so afraid ofㅡthat Junhui would like him less after finding out that he's a stripper, he really shouldn't have. If anything, that fact only made Junhui like him more. He just keeps falling deeper and deeper, and there's no way out.

> _Baby, there's nothing holding me back_  
>  _There's nothing holding me back_  
>  _There's nothing holding me back_

"The CEO is not happy with you, Junhui. This could cost you your career!" Junhui's manager yelled.

Today was J-Unit's concert day and Junhui had just gone backstage to prepare for his solo performance after making a small announcement which drove his manager crazy.

"Do you even care about your future? Junhui, listen to me! Why the fuck did you come out without the company's consent?"

Junhui didn't even spare his manager a glance and just stretched his fingers. He heard clapping and eventually Jeonghan and Joshua emerged into the backstage after their duet song. Junhui loves his bandmates, he really does. And he knew he put their whole career on the line by doing what he did, but he loved Minghao too much that he didn't even think twice.

He was too guilty to meet his members' eyes after what he's done, so he quietly made his way near the stage and waited for the emcee to cue him. Unexpectedly, just before he stepped on stage, he saw his bandmates giving him thumbs-ups and mouthing encouraging words. At some point, he thinks he even heard Joshua's "go get him" from the backstage.

Junhui smiled at them and sat on the piano, ready to pour his emotions out into the microphone to be broadcasted to the whole stadium.

The first verse came out smoothly, and his eyes met Minghao's, who was sitting on the barricade infront of the VIP section. The interaction fueled Junhui's confidence, and the next few verses were sung with overflowing emotion. He wanted to let his lover know that he meant every word.

_'Cause if we lost our minds and we took it way too far_  
_I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright_  
_If you were by my side and we stumbled in the dark_  
_I know we'd be alright, I know we would be alright_

By the time he sang the bridge, the whole stadium was cheering. Junhui looked at Minghao to see him looking at his surroundings, taking in the support that Junhui's fans were giving to their relationship.

_I feel so free when you're with me, baby._

Minghao turned to meet Junhui's eyes and mouthed three words that made Junhui's heart burst out from is chest.

_Baby, there's nothing holding me back._

Everything was going to be alright, after all.

**Author's Note:**

> title and plot based on Shawn Mendes's "There's Nothin' Holding Me Back"


End file.
